Not Quite What We Had In Mind…

Yesterday, as I was getting my hair cut, I asked my hairdresser Lauren whether her husband would get her flowers for Valentine’s Day. Lauren said “Definitely not!” Astonished by this quick and unexpected response, I asked what made her so sure. She told me that before she was married, her boyfriend used to give her flowers every Friday. But being “young and naïve” she asked whether he could not think of something more original than giving her flowers every Friday. The boyfriend nodded and on the following Friday he gave her a plastic rose saying that this would have to last for the rest of her life as he was never going to buy her flowers again. Ten years later, Lauren says, he's on track…

On average, men in the US spend $159 dollars on giving in to peer pressure and spoiling their loved ones on the flower-industries favourite day of the year. Fortunately there are plenty of alternative Valentine’s goodies for crazy ladies who do not appreciate flowers: chocolates, toys, edible underwear, photo frames, spa vouchers, champagne, romantic CDs…

As men try to be a bit more creative than CTF (chocolates, toys and flowers – not complaining) and everyone is trying to get a slice of the gigantic Valentine’s Day Spending Pie, there are endless ways to spend this money. But the most novel and controversial idea may come from New York’s Bronx Zoo which advertises its – certainly unique - “limited-time Valentine’s Day offer” as “flowers wilt, chocolates melt, roaches are forever”.

For a mere $10, you can… dum dum dum… name a cockroach after your loved one!

The Zoo claims that naming a cockroach after your sweetheart this Valentine’s Day shows that you “have noticed how resilient, resourceful and loyal” they are. The offer is strictly limited to the 58 000 roaches the Zoo has… so you better hurry up and secure your roach - your girlfriend would certainly be very disappointed if she was left without one this Valentine’s Day!

With a finger on the pulse, the National Treasury obviously spotted this new trend away from flowers towards roaches. But rather than spending lots of money on only naming roaches after its valued employees, it decided to go one step further: It gave us actual cockroaches! And what better place to put them and make sure that everyone can appreciate them than the kitchen… Thanks Treasury!