Life is Not a Box of Chocolates

Until the mid 20th century the global chocolate industry faced a huge problem – a lack of holidays and between Easter and Christmas meant that the never-ending circle of life, during which Santa Clause is reborn as the Easter bunny and Rudolph magically transforms into the Paschal lamb, was endangered! The time between Christmas and Easter was too long to keep chocolate and the circle of life could not be sustained! This did not only pose the industry with wildlife conservation problems, confronted it with Sweetpeace campaigns, but also raised the serious problem of how to get rid of tons of leftover stocks (and if you’re now gonna say that the time between Easter and Christmas is even longer, think about when the first Santa’s hit the shops… ).

The industry was in a desperate position: wasting chocolate is a cardinal sin and a ruthless crime! Left stranded, melting and looking for answers, the industry turned to God and he, acknowledging their prayers, shared his endless love with them and encouraged them to share it amongst each other on Valentine’s Day! This not only meant that men had to remember one more meaningless date in addition to birthdays and all sorts of anniversaries, but also gave industry another holiday which they could shamelessly exploit!

And so every year in February teddy bears with cheesy messages appear in every shop; hearts are painted on windows; flower shops make more money than on any other day of the year; the post delivers one billion letters and the chocolate industry can recycle Rudolph and save their mortal souls!

But while the rest of the world bows to social (and female) pressure and buys their loved ones flowers and chocolates, South African’s should expect a somewhat different present from their partners – at least if they follow the inspirational suggestions by the “Welfare Team” of the National Treasury:

Firstly, 32 per cent of South African adults are classified as overweight and 16 per cent are considered obese. Should society really encourage the consumption of chocolates when a third of the population has already more sugar running through their veins than blood?

Secondly, there are 42 000 girls aged between 13 and 18 who do not attend school because they are pregnant. Should we really encourage teenage boys to give their girlfriends chocolate so that the girls think their boyfriends are really “sweet and special” and sleep with them... obviously without a condom because the boy spent all his money on the chocolate?

Or lastly, and while I realise the importance of the first two points, I have a slight feeling that the third reason is behind the romantic initiative by our Welfare Support Staff: An estimated 5.2 million people out of a total population of 49.3 million are living with HIV in South Africa and in 2010, 380 000 are estimated to die of HIV.

So while a box of chocolates can certainly help you survive a bad Tuesday morning, a box of condoms is not only good for your weight and allows your teenage daughter to finish her education, but it may also end up saving your life in a country like South Africa…

PS: After writing this entry I went onto almighty Wikipedia and realised that Valentine’s Day was actually introduced by Pope Gelasius in 496AD as a holiday to celebrate love and affection between intimate companions! In the 19th century the sending of – sometimes anonymous cards – became popular. Only in the second half of the 20th century does the chocolate industry enter our little story about Saint Valentine and people started giving each other gifts and flowers as well as cards. Since then, the holiday has been promoted and branded by many industries, became commercialised, lost any true romantic appeal and probably deserves the nickname “Single’s Awareness Day”…