Embracing Negativity

I recently changed my health insurance and as part of a voluntary health screening, I was not only measured and weighed, tested for cholesterol and glucose, but also asked whether I wanted to do an HIV test.

Living in a country with one of the world’s highest HIV prevalence rates and working a lot on HIV issues, I of course know of the importance of HIV testing. These days, if diagnosed early, HIV can be treated quite successfully and amazingly even prevented (through a four week long chemical cocktail similar to the morning after pill).

Hundreds of campaigns educate South Africans about the importance of “knowing your status” and an impressive Government initiative aims to test 15m people by 2012. Our honourable president, Mr Jacob “I don’t have HIV - I shower afterwards” Zuma led by example and got tested last year (Negative, of course, how dare you even ask! Did you not listen? He had a shower!).


So HIV awareness campaigns and opportunities for testing are all around me. Yet I had never actually taken a test myself...

Even though I had no reason to fear it, I was nervous. After all, no matter how well you protect yourself, you can never be 100% sure... And despite all progress in treatment, HIV remains an illness that changes ones life completely. People with HIV/AIDS are not only exposed to all sorts of medical risks ranging from “minor” ones such as weakness and weight loss to very significant ones such as increased risk of infections, cancers and tumours; but they also have to deal with the fear, negative attitude and stigma that continues to exist in the public. Interactions with strangers, friends and even family members may change; relationships may not survive a positive diagnosis; new love may be harder to find; and you may have to give up on that dream of starting a family...

So I think being nervous when taking an HIV test is quite normal. But all “fear” aside, what had really put me off taking a test so far was the wait. Back in the days, a friend of mine got tested and she had to wait a couple of weeks for the results. Weeks of agony for her as she was genuinely worried – but even without concerns, I still thought it was too long to be in limbo.

So I was pleasantly surprised when the nurse, who had simply decided I would do it, told me within a minute – in between measuring and weighing me - “By the way, it’s negative”.

Needless to say I was relieved!

As expected, everything is okay with me – blood sugar and cholesterol included – and I walked away healthy, happy and proud.

Happy that all is good; proud to have finally done it; and relieved that there won’t be major changes to my life plan and my sisters can still hope to become aunts... one fine day, far far away!


PS: When researching this post I came across some interesting facts about the history of the virus:

“In the general press, the term GRID, which stood for gay-related immune deficiency, had been coined.

The Center for Disease Control, in search of a name, and looking at the infected communities coined “the 4H disease” as it seemed to single out Haitians, homosexuals, hemophiliacs, and heroin users.

However, after determining that AIDS was not isolated to the gay community, the term GRID became misleading and AIDS was introduced at a meeting in July 1982."